Divorce is a process, not an event.
DIVORCE: It is true what they say; the break-up of a marriage is one of the most stressful events you can go through. Typically the process begins after many months, or even years, of discord. This means that before financial problems, parenting concerns, losses and litigation even start, spouses are already frustrated, highly emotional and exhausted. Without proper support, divorce can easily lead to a prolonged period of personal and familial crisis.
WHAT TO EXPECT:
Divorce is a process, not an event. It takes time and support to move through it and recover. Along the way you are likely to experience many difficult emotions, including: grief, shame, anger/rage, fear, depression, disorientation, overwhelm and loneliness.
WHAT HELPS:
Connecting with others through these difficult feelings is vital. Talking with people who know the terrain can be calming, normalizing, and reassuring (no, you are not crazy!). In addition, others in your situation will undoubtedly have wisdom to share about managing the ups and downs, as well as a very real understanding of what you are going through. In my experience, people who seek group or individual counseling during the pre-, mid- and post- stages of divorce are more likely to bounce back with their self-esteem intact (or even stronger than before!) and a sense of trust and hope in the future.
| Rachel Walker, MFT | (510) 501-2936 | rachel@rachelwalkermft.com |